Broken into fragments, I was able to examine the points of my fractures.
Just when you think you know yourself, there's more to know.
Like being back from the dead.
Gotta come down some time.
All that to say: Being a director last week was humbling. It's hard to to balance sometimes knowing what you know and knowing what you don't. Which is why I loved DPing everyone else's short films. It felt good to know that people depended on me to translate their words into visuals. It was good practice on my end as well.
Then when I met a female gaffer I know at the lighting workshop, I lost my shit. I miss gripping and studying the gaffing trade. Gripping is problem solving in another way. The feeling is like building legos or solving a rubix cube to create more shadow; diffuse light; contain light, at the twist of a knob; a connect of a cardilini clamp. I probably want to be in G&E while I direct my own projects.
But also: Directing is the goal. I know I have it in me to be in that position.
i just gotta keep doing it. I think it teaches me a lot of things in my personal life too like; communication; diplomacy; collaboration; understanding others; and that's especially important if you're also going to write your own movies. Even more important if you want to forge loving relationships.
Here's a rough cut of my video:
Just kidding. That's the bootleg version. This is the real one with temp music. My friendo is going to whip up some sick beats for me.
Mira Nair inspires me to smashcut where Ramona enters (so does the time limit). It does create a sense of juxtaposition between the two characters, but I definitely need to look at my story and see where I can emphasize what I want through editing. Mira Nair also inspires me to use my surroundings. As of now, the edit looks okay, but if I wanted to add the Chinese New Year parade element like I had originally wanted, it would take a bit more finessing. I like that Nair always says to trust in your own instincts and to edit the shit out of it (not verbatim) until you're happy with it.
I'll do that.